Hard Work + Understanding = Insight

Dysfunction has been with me
since my birth.
Fed to me in my baby bottle.
As I grew,
it helped me to misjudge
my self worth.
It was taught to me
along with my ABC's
Math and Reading.
Creating in me insecurities
that would be misleading.
Dysfunction took the place
of a fathers love.
An "I love you" from him
was unheard of.
My father seldom spoke to me,
only to give an order or to complain.
I didn't feel any love for him.
Just hate and fear,
it was ingrained.
My father worked days .
My mother worked nights.
Not having them together
cut down on week night fights.
My mother ruled our domain with
guilt and manipulation.
Looking at my family,
you can see we didn't have
a sound foundation.
Drinking on the weekends
fueled the alcohol induced fights.
The yelling, screaming, and swearing
went well into the night.
It was the same old thing on Saturday nights,
with my dad smashing, throwing and
breaking our things,
it added anxiety to my fright.
Looking back on my life
sometimes I wonder how I survived.
Surrounded by all this abuse and dysfunction,
it was hard to keep my soul alive.
Alive it was.
Hidden in a special place.
Just waiting for a time
when my abuse and dysfunction
I could face.
I now walk in my truth.
I now stand in the light.
With hard work comes understanding
which leads to insight.

And

I am not looking forward
to the time we have to say good-bye.
You have been there to help
keep my soul alive.
You have been there to listen
and to help guide.
Assisting me to see things
from another side.
It is time for you to move on and
find your place.
Helping many others in our human race.

I will miss you.